Seaside musings

 Seaside musings

Every year, we take a week off to go to the beach. We've been to this hotel many times, and even though a few changes have been made to it over time, it looks almost exactly the same as it did on our first visit, twenty three years ago.

I could not say the same about our life, at least not at first sight. A lot has changed over the years: circumstances, relationships, work, dreams...

I was never one to make a lot of plans or to have clearly defined goals, but even so, I realise only few things about my current life are as the teenager or the young adult I once was (and who at some point stayed at this same hotel) imagined they would be.

And the interesting thing about this is this: that which is "different" from how I imagined it would be,  is different precisely because  it is so much like how my life used to be, especially during my childhood. Douglas Harding, an author I really admire, wrote in one of his books that "the child is the  father of the adult". In my case, it seems so clear that the woman I am today, as well as my work, the things that interest me, my joys and my challenges have so much more to do with what I went through and learned as a child than with what I experienced later on in my life.

I've been thinking a lot about these things  during this quiet week, in this place where buildings that don't change and the ocean, with its eternal enormity and beauty, let us feel  so clearly just how short, but also how miraculous, our existence is.

In this spirit of wonder and joy, I came up with an idea for this post: to make a list of 25  of the things for which I am most grateful and happy today. 

I am grateful....

1. That I am, once again,  in this beautiful place, enjoying the sun, the breeze, the wonderful landscapes, the quiet.
2. That the job that both my mom and I chose still allows us to have this and other luxuries from time to time.
3.  Because vacation time became even more fun after I had my son, who is the best present life has ever given me.
4. Because I am still here, on this planet.
5. Because my loved ones are still around too.
6. Because the stupid and reckless moments in my life didn't have any serious consequences.
7. Because the worries, the doubts and the vain pursuits of the past have subsided me and all that is left is peace.
8. For friends: old ones, new ones, the ones I only meet on Facebook... They all are  unexpected gifts from life.
9. Because old sorrows, griefs, regrets and disappointments CAN indeed stay in the past.
10. For all the books, movies, music and places I've had the privilege of enjoying and for the good  they left in me.
11. For all the students, young and older, I've had over two decades; for everything we've learned together and all they've taught  me.
12. For the many excellent teachers I've had my life, ever since I was a little girl. For the ones I met in person and for those I only know through their writings.
13. For Sally, the best therapist in the world; for her being an example of everything you can accomplish when you face life with effort and brains.
14. For my grandma Nair and for everything hers that exists both in my mom and  me; like taking life seriously and with intent, and for our love of cooking.
15. Because, despite our resistance, our fears and our stubbornness, that which is wise in us never ceases to nudge us in the direction of more fully realizing our talents, our dreams and our healing.
16. For the love we've received in life, from family, friends and strangers.
17. For all the dear dogs that have been with me, for years or days.
18. For shared laughter.
19. Because grace can manifest in an ordinary life and change everything.
20. Because life's surprises, rewards and lessons do not depend on our limited means.
21. For second, third and nth chances.
22. Because, even if it might take us time, work and pain to understand it, there is a special place for each and everyone of us in this world, just as we are.
23. For the way in which things work themselves out in our favor, despite our constant worrying and occasional lack of gratitude.
24. For everything still  left for me to learn and do...

What fills me with wonder these days, when I think about it, is the fact that despite  the sorrows, the failures, the mistakes, and the losses we all inevitably experience in life, from a deeper perspective, we  actually never lose, nor get lost.

If we learn to stay open and trusting, we begin to see that out of every negative situation, come lessons, change and the possibility of growing in love, maturity, compassion and freedom. I sometimes see this as life's surprise gift to us, an extra we weren't expecting.

In fact, not only does life offer us opportunities to grow and develop physically, mentally, emotionally, professionally, and spiritually,  in other words, to be the person we want to be,  also, AS A BONUS, whether everything works out fine, or  everything comes out wrong, or if only a few of our dreams come true, it shows us that wherever we are is the perfect place for us to find happiness, joy, fulfillment, and peace, exactly as we most need to experience them.

To me, this is the safety net  that life always lays down for us. And that is grace; it's redemption.

So,  I am grateful...

25. That, no matter how our acrobatics number comes out, the ending will always be a happy one and there will always be a way back home.

What about you? What are you thankful for? In what ways do you feel redeemed?

Find me on Instagram: manzana_iridiscente12

Or write to me at: theiridescentapple@yahoo.com

Credit Thank You pic: Courtney Hedger at Unsplash